Writing Glitch #9

(Yes, this one is out of order. I clicked the wrong button yesterday, or something. Tomorrow’s glitch will be number eleven, though.)

Today’s glitch:

glitch10

No dash (that’s what the hyphen there wants to be when it grows up), because there is no abrupt change in thought in the sentence. At most, you could delete and and begin a new sentence with Though. If the object is literally named the Talisman, the capitalization works, but I see no indication of that here, and the pronoun he should not be capitalized except at the start of a sentence (or if referring to a deity, but again, that’s highly unlikely here, and if it is the case, His needs to be capitalized, too).

After all these years, the talisman was finally his, and though he knew in his heard it would be the cause of his demise, he did not care.

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About Thomas Weaver

I’m a writer and editor who got into professional editing almost by accident years ago when a friend from university needed someone to copyedit his screenplay about giant stompy robots (mecha). Having discovered that I greatly enjoy this kind of work, I’ve been putting my uncanny knack for grammar and punctuation, along with an eclectic mental collection of facts, to good use ever since as a Wielder of the Red Pen of Doom. I'm physically disabled, and for the past several years, I’ve lived with my smugly good-looking twin Paul, who writes military science fiction and refuses to talk about his military service because he can’t. Sometimes Paul and I collaborate on stories, and sometimes I just edit whatever he writes. It's worked out rather well so far. My list of non-writing-related jobs from the past includes librarian, art model, high school teacher, science lab gofer… Although I have no spouse or offspring to tell you about, I do have six cats. (The preferred term is "Insane Cat Gentleman.") I currently spend my time blogging, reading, editing, and fending off cats who like my desk better than my twin’s.
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