Writing Glitch #236

Today’s glitch:

glitch257

The first sentence in the example contains a comma splice (two sentences incorrectly joined by a comma).

The second actual sentence (beginning with As you know) needs a comma after know.

Welcome to Eden Station. As you know, the Earth is about to be destroyed. Please follow the green line to your assigned quarters and enjoy the show.

I don’t like the second sentence — it’s quite clunky — but I don’t see any easy way to fix it, and I don’t feel like rewriting the whole thing for a mere grammar-and-punctuation exercise.

 

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About Thomas Weaver

I’m a writer and editor who got into professional editing almost by accident years ago when a friend from university needed someone to copyedit his screenplay about giant stompy robots (mecha). Having discovered that I greatly enjoy this kind of work, I’ve been putting my uncanny knack for grammar and punctuation, along with an eclectic mental collection of facts, to good use ever since as a Wielder of the Red Pen of Doom. I'm physically disabled, and for the past several years, I’ve lived with my smugly good-looking twin Paul, who writes military science fiction and refuses to talk about his military service because he can’t. Sometimes Paul and I collaborate on stories, and sometimes I just edit whatever he writes. It's worked out rather well so far. My list of non-writing-related jobs from the past includes librarian, art model, high school teacher, science lab gofer… Although I have no spouse or offspring to tell you about, I do have six cats. (The preferred term is "Insane Cat Gentleman.") I currently spend my time blogging, reading, editing, and fending off cats who like my desk better than my twin’s.
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2 Responses to Writing Glitch #236

  1. Would it be acceptable without the “the” in front of the word Earth?

    Like

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