Writing Glitch #280

Today’s glitch (better late than never):

glitch308

Get rid of the comma after closed (yes, there are two verbs, lay and thought, but She is the only subject, so the sentence isn’t compound) and add a comma after cold. (Sterile describes place. Cold also describes place, not sterile. Thus, you need a comma between these adjectives.)

She lay in bed with her eyes closed and thought about a time before she came to be a prisoner in this cold, sterile place.

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About Thomas Weaver

I’m a writer and editor who got into professional editing almost by accident years ago when a friend from university needed someone to copyedit his screenplay about giant stompy robots (mecha). Having discovered that I greatly enjoy this kind of work, I’ve been putting my uncanny knack for grammar and punctuation, along with an eclectic mental collection of facts, to good use ever since as a Wielder of the Red Pen of Doom. I'm physically disabled, and for the past several years, I’ve lived with my smugly good-looking twin Paul, who writes military science fiction and refuses to talk about his military service because he can’t. Sometimes Paul and I collaborate on stories, and sometimes I just edit whatever he writes. It's worked out rather well so far. My list of non-writing-related jobs from the past includes librarian, art model, high school teacher, science lab gofer… Although I have no spouse or offspring to tell you about, I do have six cats. (The preferred term is "Insane Cat Gentleman.") I currently spend my time blogging, reading, editing, and fending off cats who like my desk better than my twin’s.
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3 Responses to Writing Glitch #280

  1. Sharon Hart says:

    Thanks to you, I am very aware of misplaced commas in my writing and pounce on them like a large, hungry tiger.

    On Tue, Jan 17, 2017 at 10:22 PM, North of Andover wrote:

    > Thomas Weaver posted: “Today’s glitch (better late than never): Get rid of > the comma after closed (yes, there are two verbs, lay and thought, but She > is the only subject, so the sentence isn’t compound) and add a comma after > cold. (Sterile describes place. Cold also describe” >

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I hate to do this again, but, shouldn’t that be ‘lie in bed?’ It may be regional. If so, my apology.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. The present-tense form of “to lie” is “lie” (or “lies,” for third person), but the example is in past tense, and the past-tense form is “lay.”

    Like

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