Most numbers should be spelled out instead of written in numerals: fifty-eight, not 58.
Hyphenate fifty-eight-year-old (compound adjective describing woman).
Get rid of the comma after woman.
Add a comma after home. (Yes, I like the Oxford comma, because I find it makes sentences so much clearer. As smol snecks would say in snek memes, Don’t like? Heck you. Am doing a grammar.)
Why, for cryin’ out loud, would anyone capitalize an adjective such as level-headed? Why?
A shy fifty-eight-year-old woman who comes from a wealthy family, lives in an architect-designed home, and tends to work too hard. She is level-headed and efficient.